Why Am I So Lonely? 10 Strategies for Overcoming Loneliness

Learn why you’re feeling lonely and practical strategies to overcome loneliness and get back in the game.

We’ve all been there — staring at a screen surrounded by endless posts of smiling faces, curated vacations and perfect outfits, while we sit in our rooms scrolling through our feeds, wondering why we feel so alone. You’re not alone in feeling this way. Loneliness is becoming more prevalent, especially among young people — including 73% of Gen Z. 

The feels are real, and they're not just hitting while we’re doom-scrolling late at night; they're there in the everyday moments, like sitting surrounded by people but feeling like an NPC in your own life.

There are ways to work through it, helping you move back into the game. So, let’s look at why loneliness affects so many of us, and more importantly, what we can do about it.

Understanding Loneliness

Loneliness isn’t necessarily about being physically alone; it's tied to how connected you feel to the people around you. And a state of disconnection is happening more than you might think.

In fact, loneliness is more common now than ever — especially in the digital age — and our understanding of it is scattered, at best. For instance, according to the study mentioned above, almost three in four Gen Z employees prefer in-person management comms at work, whereas nearly all managers believe that Gen Z prefers instant messages. That’s a pretty staggering misperception. 

And it’s not just you. A whole generation is struggling with feelings of miscalculated isolation in ways we haven’t experienced before.

So why is this happening? Let’s break down some of the core causes:

1. Social Media

Social media gives us a forged sense of connection for two reasons. First, we scroll through feeds of other people’s lives without properly interacting. Second, social threads show the highlight reels and skip the bloopers. When we see these perfected snapshots, it’s easy to feel like our lives are falling short. This becomes a breeding ground for comparison, rather than genuine connection.

2. Passive Consumption

We’re living in an age of instant gratification — constantly consuming content on our phones, watching series, scrolling through feeds — but we’re doing it passively. We’re looking, not engaging. Passive consumption and social comparison are replacing real-world conversations and deep connections. This is where loneliness ticks up.

3. Dependency Shifts

We’ve seen a shift in how we connect with others. It’s all digital now. If you needed facts before the internet, you'd have to ask someone in person or read about it in a book. Sometimes you'd have to ask for the book. If you wanted to share jokes or memories, you'd pick up the phone and chat. Nowadays, our firmly-rooted dependency on genuine social interaction is replaced by a dependency on tech. While tech helps us stay in touch, it’s easy to lose the depth of our relationships when they’re mostly online.

4. Overstimulation

There’s a lot of noise. A constant bombardment of notifications, news updates, social reels and stories can get pretty overwhelming. We need a CEO-level brain just to process the world around us. When we don’t have time to sit with our thoughts, we might start feeling isolated.

5. Low Self-Confidence

When you’re low-key unsure of yourself, it’s easy to withdraw. Maybe you think you’re not “cool enough” to hang out with others or that your life isn’t interesting enough to share. Unfortunately, even a small negative thought can spiral fast, making loneliness feel even more intense.

These causes don’t just appear out of nowhere. They’re threaded through the construction of modern life. But acknowledging them is the first step in fighting back.

What Are the Impacts of Loneliness?

The impacts of loneliness can change, depending on things like circumstance and exposure. Even mild loneliness moves beyond an occasional feeling, potentially causing low self-esteem or affecting social relationships. Persistent loneliness can contribute to mental health challenges. This means untreated loneliness can have some serious impacts on both our mental and physical health.

Mental Wellness

Loneliness often goes hand-in-hand with mental health struggles like social anxiety and depression. It’s hard to feel happy when you’re isolated, and the longer it lasts, the deeper the feelings of sadness may venture. But there is hope: Loneliness doesn’t have to be a life sentence.

Decreased Memory and Learning

Research shows that loneliness can affect your cognitive abilities, making it harder to remember things and learn new information. Your brain is a social organ. Like the stomach and digestion, it can slow down when it’s not getting the stimulation it needs. 

Increased Stress

Loneliness can trigger a stress response, which messes with your mental state and physical health. Prolonged social isolation can lead to higher levels of stress, which affects everything from your immune system to your sleep patterns.

But here’s the good news: These impacts can be reversed. You don’t have to stay in this cycle. While loneliness itself is not a mental health condition, if you believe your mental health is suffering as a result of loneliness, it's advised to speak with a trusted loved one or medical practitioner — or maybe even seek therapy for emotional support during your journey. To complement your efforts, there are also positive ways to take action against loneliness.

How Do I Overcome Loneliness?

We know that loneliness is real. Now it’s time to get real about how to deal with it. 

The path to connection and emotional well-being isn’t always easy, but it’s worth it. Below are 10 strategies to help you move through loneliness and start feeling more connected.

1. Make Online Time More Proactive

We’re out here bingeing content like it’s cardio, but where’s the engagement? If your social media is giving ghost mode rather than social butterfly, ditch the doom scrolling.

One-to-one video chat platforms, like Azar, offer opportunities to have real conversations with new people in a low-pressure, fun online environment. If you need a way to let off some steam or just vibe with somebody new — and spend online time actively — Azar makes it more accessible than ever.

2. Strengthen an Existing Relationship

Maybe you’ve been putting off a coffee date with a friend, or maybe there’s someone you’ve been meaning to check in on but haven't found the time. Take the first step. Reach out to your circle and deepen your connection. Shared moments and memories with those you care about can bring immediate comfort.

3. Join or Start a Group

This one is all about finding a sense of community. Whether it’s joining an online book club, a workout group or a hobby class, having a regular commitment where you interact with others can fill your social cup. It doesn’t have to be complicated — just something that brings you together with like-minded people.

Don't be afraid to take the initiative and bring people together — interest groups are one of the easiest tricks in the book to make friends as an adult. Start small with a few friends or acquaintances and watch as new connections roll in to share your interests over time. 

4. Practice Self-Kindness

In the loneliness epidemic, you'd be surprised how many people blame themselves for their feelings. But remember: You’re not failing. Show yourself the same compassion you’d show a friend. Whether it’s journaling, taking a walk in nature or giving yourself credit for getting through the day, self-care is essential.

5. Talk About Your Feelings

Sometimes, the hardest thing is admitting that you feel lonely. Once you do, it’s much easier to talk about it. Open up to someone you trust — a friend, sibling or parent — about where you're at. Just saying it out loud can lighten the load and vulnerability is a great way to build connection and understanding with a loved one.

6. Explore New Hobbies

Focusing on something new gives a sense of purpose and presents opportunities to meet like-minded individuals. Go full main-character energy and try something creative like painting or cooking to get your mind firing with new inspiration. Physical activities like yoga or rock climbing could also give you a regular boost in feel-good endorphins.

7. Start a Conversation With Someone New

Striking up a convo can feel intimidating, but it's rarely as scary as we imagine. Whether it’s a new classmate, a colleague or a stranger at the coffee shop, saying hi to someone can break a cycle of isolation, give a confidence hit and lead to meaningful connections. And, you'd be surprised at the peer support you could receive chatting with new people on platforms like Azar. 

8. Reach Out

It’s easy to wait for others to reach out to you. However, sometimes, you need to take the first step. Send the text. Make the call. The people you want to talk to are likely waiting for you to make the move, as well.

If you don't feel like reaching out for the sake of it, check out some local events or new restaurants to visit with your friend. If you're living far away, stream a movie or listen to an album together over the phone or video chat. 

9. Ask Friends or Family for Help

Instead of turning to search engines for the answers, ask the people who care about you. Whether it’s advice, a listening ear or a recommendation for a therapist, there’s no harm in asking for help. The people closest to us are typically the most invested in our well-being, so lean into that support network.

10. Avoid the Comparison Trap

It may be tempting to compare your life to the curated, highlight-reel lives of those on social media. Everyone’s journey is different, and most people aren't sharing their everyday struggles openly on socials. 

Stay focused on your path, and remember, filters don't equal real life. People aren't out there snapping pics of their failed food delivery or breakdowns over an ex's posts. Don't let the digital noise derail your self-worth.

Meet New People on Azar

The loneliness epidemic is real and it's hitting young adults the hardest. Take time to reflect on where your feelings of loneliness may stem from, choose some strategies to try out and then take action. 

If you need a low-pressure space to connect with like-minded people or release stress in a one-to-one space, join Azar and swap doom scrolling for actual convos. Initiate casual, lighthearted chats and meet people who can relate to your experiences — no strings attached.

You’ve got the strategies and now you’ve got the tools. Start chatting now and take that first step toward connection.

Disclaimer: This article is not a substitute for professional medical advice. The above list of causes and symptoms is not exhaustive, nor should any of the mentioned strategies to deal with loneliness be considered medical advice to treat potential or existing mental health conditions. If you're experiencing concerns about your mental health, speak with a trusted friend, family member, doctor or licensed counselor.